When I started a venture of full-time law school and part-time work, volunteering, work experience, my schedule was something that went from one day to the next. Most of the work was administrative; the sheer amount of admin work to sort out my schedules, apply for new jobs, respond to emails… made me almost tire of planning, fearing the addition of more admin work to the overwhelming pile.
There is a lot on the plate at the moment… and I’m working more hours than ever before… so this calls for a renewed productivity system. One of deep work (Cal Newport style)
Even to this day, some of my nightmares are missing a deadline. Or coming in late to a meeting.
I used to be one of those people who was perpetually late in high school. The one who saunters in with a late slip. Everyday. The office ladies knew my name off my heart. Teachers rolled their eyes when I entered: “you again.” Although this should be embarrassing, I’m not the least embarrassed to say I actually turned up late to my own senior graduation.
It wasn’t that I didn’t take my education seriously — I did to an indescribable extent, and still do. But I’m attributing this to being so chaotic that I needed some place to spread my vortex of an energy without restraint.
When you are working, however, there are people counting on you. Not showing up to a class hurts only you; but not meeting a deadline hurts your company and your reputation as a dependable employee.
I was so determined to be on schedule. To meet deadlines. To be responsible for matters of diligence and detail-orientation (two things that are so against my type-b nature).
I am so glad I learned all this. But I need to return to attempt balancing this responsibility with planning, and very deliberate and focussed admin.
Tomorrow I restart planning! Will post updates on what my schedule and plans look like. But I’m so committed to restart again.
I have built the inertia of living day by day, completing the tasks ahead of me without much time spare for organised focussed thought. But it’s never to late to change the trajectory; and inshAllah mine changes tomorrow!
(Scribed at 3:03 am when I gotta get up for fajr at like 6 and go to work at like 9 hahahahahahahahahaahahaha)